Sometimes, i do wonder if there's fairness in th world. If friends really bail on you when you needed them most. When families and relatives don't even care about your existence, when you don't have anymore reasons to be in this place already. Who can i turn to? Who can i count on? And who can i trust again? I wonder, what would happen if friends bear grudges(?) with each other. Will there still be BFFs? Will there be letters from penpals instead of atomic bombs? Will you stil go home as it was th safest place you thought you can be? Before i sleep everynight, i would wonder what will happen tmr. What if i just died in my sleep? I have nothing to offer you, my dear friend. Will our friendship last th whole journey of life, or am i just your stepping stone to another friendship? That smile i put on my face is just a mask to cover up for everything, isn't it? And, i don't know what you said is true or what, but i know that we would never be like last time anymore. Wouldn't you wish you could press rewind, or just open your mind. You said she's not me and no one could represent me but hey, i don't think so. I stood there like a dumbass, watching you walk away. I don't wish to b a disturbance in your life, you seem happier with her and i don't want to destory the perfect friendship you have with her. Ya, maybe i was thinking too much. Maybe even too hard, i thought my life here was perfect. Friends, grades, everything. But these didn't last long, i guess she would be a better choice?
I lose out in many things, sometimes i just want to lie down and forget about life. I don't want t fight for it anymore. Action speaks louder then words, all those times together are crap when you have fun with her. Even if you are together with me, ask yourself, if you are seriously happy. Dangs, my mind is so in a twril after this entry. Cufk. Im so having th arugh and th ahhhs and th throw everything around mood now. I'm so unhappy, and i don't like this feeling. Ah, random-ness. I need an hour long cold shower, followed by a thirty min hot shower. Hopefully, i'm fine after that .D:

*P.S/ This is not about friends from school/outside. This is just my thoughts and ya, those urghhh and th ahhhhhs moods of my mind :D